Vacation Recap Part 2 - or - Liz Is Very, Very Lazy

Sorry for the delay! I suck. As usual, there are pictures. Without further ado…

LV to LA – Merrily We Roll Along
Luis and I made it to Avis a bit earlier than expected, so we hit the road in our cute little convertible a full hour ahead of schedule. Hurray for the ol’ OCD, right? The drive took just about 5 hours and was wholly uneventful, aside from the not-so-epic battle Luis and I had over the convertible top. I wanted it down for the whole time: after all, we paid extra for the damn thing so we could have a fun drive through the desert! Luis wanted it down only when it was above 65 degrees because apparently he is a delicate flower. I keed, I keed. ;) He was right, I must admit. Had we driven all the way to LA with the top down, I’m sure we would’ve been miserable. At any rate, the scenery was amazing as we drove through the complete flat monotone of the desert into California’s mountains. Luis was surprised that there was so much sky, and I fell back in love (at least a little) with my birth state.

We stayed at The Standard in Downtown, L.A. – a slightly odd location I admit, but I chose it based on the great rate and its proximity to multiple freeways, the lifeline of California travel. Our room was modern and interesting, though certainly not designed with modesty in mind: the bedroom looked directly into the shower/bathroom via a floor to ceiling glass wall. The idea sounds sexy, sure, but we always shower together so there was no one to gawk at, and it was sort of unappealing to have to draw the shower curtain every time one of us had to take a dump. ‘Scuse me honey, I’m just gonna drop the kids off at the pool. Aye!

After freshening up, we drove up to Burbank so that I could show Luis the old haunts, school, and house. We ate dinner at The Castaway which has an amazing view of the entire San Fernando Valley. You have to see it to believe it – it’s really breathtaking. Unfortunately, the food leaves quite a bit to be desired. I was particularly keen on going there because it was one of my grandmother’s favorite restaurants and I fondly recall our Sunday brunches there. Then again, she died when I was eight, so the kitchen has had a lot of time to go downhill.

M-I-C-K-E-Y-M-O-U-S-E
Friday was el dia de Disney – this was carefully orchestrated on my part to ensure that we didn’t have full-force weekend crowds but were still able to see Fantasmic which is my absolute favorite thing about Disneyland and only runs on the weekends during the non-summer months. Luis had never been to Disneyland or any other theme park, so I was determined to pack his day full of fun.

The first order of business was clear: Indiana Jones Adventure. By far the best ride at Disneyland, this ride always has the longest wait, so I wanted to hit it first to be sure that we didn’t run out of time. Poor Luis has heard me wax rhapsodic about this ride ever since we first started dating, so I think it was probably a relief for him to finally ride it and shut me up. He was really into the décor and theming of the line, though many of the little gimmicks weren’t working – most notably, the bamboo pole that you pull and cause the spiked ceiling to fall was clearly busted. Phooey! Once we finally boarded the ride, Luis was having a blast. It’s a very active experience to say the least, and he had a huge smile on his face. At the end, he said he wished it was longer, and I whole heartedly agree. I could ride that thing all day long. I don’t want to spoil some of the ride’s surprises here if you haven’t been on it – if you don’t care about spoilers, check out the link above for a full description.

Our ride order is listed below, alongside what I can remember of Luis’ color commentary:

Indiana Jones Adventure – awesome, wish it was longer

Haunted Mansion – meh, too old school (I was shocked, I love this ride – maybe it’s to do with riding it as a kid?)

Splash Mountain – we’re not going to get wet, are we? KerSPLOOOOSH (heh heh heh) Also, Frankie called Luis right before the drop – fortunately he had the good sense not to pick up, because he would’ve said goodbye to his phone then and there!

Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride – for kids (again, I love this one due to the nostalgia factor)

Matterhorn – really fun, fast and sharp turns (I’m working on him – he’ll become a roller coaster enthusiast yet, mark my words!)

Space Mountain – awesome! (They’ve changed this ride a lot since I was a kid – it’s darker and faster and they took away the music. I think this is the best version yet and I’m glad it’s the one Luis got to experience.)

Star Tours – pretty cool (I hate this ride, it makes me motion sick. It ended just in time, let me tell you! Burf…)

Autopia – awful (sigh… I can’t win ‘em all, I guess)

Big Thunder Mountain Railroad – lots of fun

Indiana Jones Adventure – awesome squared

Can you believe that we got all of those rides into one day? It wasn’t even 6 p.m. and we had done everything we wanted to do, short of watching Fantasmic. I was wiped out, so I told Luis to go have himself some fun in Tomorrowland (he rode Space Mountain again and hit up the arcade). I sat down right up front by the Rivers of America so that we would have good seats for the show. I have never been this hardcore before, and it is hard work sitting there for three hours on the pavement. In the rain. Boo hoo. I was worried that they might cancel the show due to the intermittent showers, and in fact, they came very close to doing so! Fortunately for Luis’ sanity (since he would hear me bitch for all eternity if they had cancelled after all that waiting), the show went forward as planned and was just as spectacular as I remember. I cry every time I watch Fantasmic, and of course Luis got a spectacularly humiliating picture of me doing just that.

Hooray for Hollywood, but Where Are the Hookers?
Today’s plan was to drive around (with the motherfucking top down) and see all the touristy sights. I drove west from The Standard all the way to Beverly Hills and took Luis up Rodeo Drive. Then we went up Laurel Canyon into the hills and saw how the other half lives. Mulholland Drive gave Luis many more opportunities to see the Valley below. A strange road closure prompted an odd and really windy descent into Hollywood, where I was…. how to put this… distraught. Now, I knew that Hollywood had undergone a significant facelift with the addition of the Kodak Theatre and the new Hollywood and Highland development, but I didn’t realize that we were basically going to Disneyland all over again. Where are the hookers? Where are the pothead skaters? Where are the stupid stores that sell only buttons, stickers, and Che t-shirts? Gone, that’s where, replaced by stucco and escalators and chain stores. I’m sure that tourism is up, and I’m sure that these changes are ultimately for the better in terms of public safety and crime rates, but I couldn’t help but shed a little tear for the way Hollywood Boulevard used to be – a hot mess.

Of Dickies, Chucks, and Universal Studios
With so much already done on this trip, today became sort of the “spare parts” day. We began by doing a little shopping out in Burbank for Luis who liked the LA look and wanted to get himself some new gear. First he bought some high-top black chucks and then he got some Dickies in khaki and navy blue. Isn’t he just precious? He looks adorable in them.

Now that shopping was checked off the list, we decided to check out Universal Studios. While not the best theme park in the area, Universal has a certain appeal, especially if you’re a movie buff and have never been on the studio tour, which is actually a crazy staged tram ride. See? – that’s JAWS comin’ ta getcha! We also went on the Back to the Future simulator (Luis proclaimed it to be just okay), the Jurassic Park water ride which has a drop at the end that goes on forever, and the Revenge of the Mummy roller coaster. Luis liked the Mummy so much, he went on it again through the (much faster) single rider line. Told you I’d turn him into a coaster enthusiast. Next time we’ll go to Magic Mountain and see if we can’t make him hurl. :)

Ain’t No Class Like First Class – the Perfect Ending to a Great Trip
Luis and I made it to Burbank airport with plenty of time to spare for our early flight home with a connection in Denver. As we were waiting, one of those horrible announcements was made that our flight was oversold and that they were looking for volunteers to give up their seats in exchange for vouchers. Then, terrifyingly, they called our names! Luis went up to see what was the matter, and we got possibly the best news ever: we could be upgraded to a direct flight from LAX to JFK that left in a few hours, getting us home even earlier than our original flight plan that included the connection. Further, we would be given Business Class seats and two vouchers for travel within the next year. As she was explaining the deal, Business Class became unavailable, so we were bumped up to First! Naturally we accepted and were put on a shuttle bus from Burbank to LAX.

First Class is phenomenal. The seats are epic in size and gymnastic ability, putting your back, ass, and legs in just about every position you could want. The leg room was absurdly abundant – if I wanted to get something in the pocket in front of me, I had to unbuckle myself, stand up, and take a full step. Then there was the food. Tablecloths were placed on our tray tables, drinks were served in real glasses, and food was eaten off of china with silver utensils. Amazing. We were served three courses with our choice of appetizer, entrée, and dessert – I had a sesame shrimp appetizer, three cheese ravioli, and an ice cream sundae. Then we were given personal DVD players with ten different new releases to choose from. My only gripe is that once we were finished with the dinner service, there wasn’t enough time to watch a two hour movie before landing. What a problem to have! A girl could get used to this.